One-Eyed Cat Named Gus

“One-eyed Cat Named Gus” Original by Robert Wimer

This was just a fun song to do. No cats were harmed in the making of this song.

Verse 1:

Well one early morning at the break of dawn
my wife looked at me and with a wink and a nod
asked me if I could go do the chors on the farm.
Well I looked and her and quietly said
“my dear, I’d love to, but as I’ve said
I’m a city slicker and don’t know nothin’ about nothin’

She looked at me with those eyes
told me “it’s easy, you’ll be suprised
because all you have to do are two things.
Just let out the chickens and feed the cats
but look out for gus as a matter of fact
he’s a one-eyed cat and he’s kinda mean”.

Chorus:

His name is Gus
So don’t you raise a fuss
when you see him
just turn the other way
’cause when he gets mad
things can get kinda bad
just ignore my words and
you’ll see what I mean

Verse 2:

Well I got the cat food and headed out
and in two shakes, I was out on the farm
and the first thing I did was feed the farm cats.
When I rustled the bag, you wouldn’t believe
all the cats that came and greeted me
20 critters to be exact, except one.

Well Gus stood a distance as if to say
“just set the food down and go your way,
and if you don’t, there’s gonna be a fight”.
So I looked at him and he looked at me
and then my wifes words came to me
“When you see Gus, you’d better turn away.”

Chorus:

His name is Gus
So don’t you raise a fuss
when you see him
just turn the other way
’cause when he gets mad
things can get kinda bad
just ignore my words and
you’ll see what I mean

Verse 3:

Well Gus walked towards me, and when he did
all 20 of his kids turned tail and hid
’cause they knew that this cat was the king
but I didn’t get the message, so I stood my ground
I looked down at him and with a frown
told that cat to back way off

No sooner than I said my words,
Gus came to my leg and opened his mouth
and let out the most gentle purr.
Well I thought things were kinda cool,
but Gus had other plans, and they were cruel
then I heard a growl and hiss, and it was on

Chorus:

His name is Gus
So don’t you raise a fuss
when you see him
just turn the other way
’cause when he gets mad
things can get kinda bad
just ignore my words and
you’ll see what I mean

Verse 4:

Well I’m a fat man, but you wouldn’t believe
how fast I moved with Gus after me
and I headed to the one place I knew
I opened the chicken house and you wouldn’t believe
all them chickens greeted me with (click noise)
and a peck, a cluck or two

So I took a few minutes to catch my breath
and made a plan to escape certain death
so I opened the door and ran like hell
I ran to my car and locked the door
and there was ol’ Gus, just waitin’ for more
sittin’ on the hood of my Oldmobile.

Chorus:

His name is Gus
So don’t you raise a fuss
when you see him
just turn the other way
’cause when he gets mad
things can get kinda bad
just ignore my words and
you’ll see what I mean

Verse 5:

I looked at him and he looked at me
I put on the gas and you wouldn’t believe
that one-eyed cat held on like a little stunt man
I rounded the corner going in reverse
and that cat looked at me, then fell off the hood
I put the car in drive and then I headed home

and as I started to drive away,
I looked behind me and I was dismayed
to see Gus and all his kids make a line
they all looked at me, growled and hissed
and I’ll have to tell you, they looked really pissed
and that was the last time I ever did the chores.

Chorus:

His name is Gus
So don’t you raise a fuss
when you see him
just turn the other way
’cause when he gets mad
things can get kinda bad
just ignore my words and
you’ll see what I mean

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